adjusting to life as a unit

We have been living in Saratoga Springs, New York for nearly two months now! In some ways, it feels longer, so I feel positively about the level of familiarity I am developing with the area. Our little family has a nice routine established, one that includes the YMCA, weekly trips to the grocer and bi-weekly trips to the mall so that Peter can get his military haircut (and we can use the indoor play area). I mention these basic outings because they have enabled us to bond and establish ourselves as a family, a luxury after living apart for the past year on duel coasts. That doesn't even include the additional challenges we endured during Peter's deployments (which made up more than six months of the year).

As you might imagine,  it was a bit of an adjustment for two fiercely independent individuals to come together after such a long time apart. In the beginning, as we unpacked and Peter realized we were there to stay (ha!), tensions were high and outbursts frequent.

In his defense, Pete had just returned from a five month deployment on a submarine and then immediately moved across the country to help move his family. Those are major changes! I tried to be calm and patient but arguments were still very frustrating for me. After a challenging year alone, I was suddenly being asked to uproot my life and our son's life to be with my husband in a new state. I had to finish an existing home renovation, rent our home, give up my job, and remove Henry from his precious preschool in a four-month period.

As I sit back to read and process the words in this post, I realize that all those stressful times are behind us and they seem increasingly trivial as we built a life together. I knew they would, but having faith and working through major life challenges is a different story. 

So here we are! We are stronger than ever and Henry is more well adjusted than ever before. 

Now it is time for me to look for a job, get involved and find Henry a school. I am taking it a day at a time. The great thing about writing is it helps clarify things, and I only just came to the conclusion that I shouldn't beat myself up for what I haven't done, because the list of what I have done this year far outweighs it. 

 photo by  kellie kano

photo by kellie kano